today i arrived from my vacation, a one week trip to palawan. it was probably the longest time i have spent since i started working three years ago. i am home again. but somehow it feels like i was home.
all my life i have been trying to prove that i am not meant to be in an island, especially one that i had no part of in making a decision to be in or to live in. i have been trying to get out of that place for as long as i remember. i was 16 when i finally got the chance. i had a reason, one that i, for so long, made into an alibi. i was going to college. and i did. i did it so well that i spent almost 6 years trying to finish a course. (i didnt waste all that time. i was part of a research/performing group for a year at expo filipino.) i took my own sweet time. it was sweet.
i stayed there for a week. on a regular occasion that would have given me the goose bumps but this time it was different. after three years i was willing to just relax and try to be there instead of somewhere else. i tried to take in as much as if i was there. i felt i belong. it felt more like home.
i have decided to go back in about two weeks. i am also thinking of staying there longer after the US trip this sept. who knows i may be going back home.
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